The annual Eurovision finale is like waving off a good friend at the airport.
We've had a wonderful time together, but sadly that has come to an end for now and I know it will be some time until we see each other again.
But at least I have the memorable moments I'll cherish. Malmo, Sweden, delivered plenty of these.
Europe may have voted for Denmark as the winner (their choice, not mine), but how can you single out just one dish from the entire buffet?
And Eurovision leaves us with more than just music. It's legacy extends well beyond melodies; it shines a light on some "interesting" fashion and choreography, some of which will stay with us long after the last piece of glitter has been swept up.
If Eurovision 2013 was a trendsetter, here's what we'll be wearing next season:
1. Spacesuits (as worn by Montenegro)
2. Glitter suits (as worn by Latvia)
3. Skirts, skorts or some other variant (as worn by Greece)
4. The sexy "Nana Mouskouri" (as worn by Israel)
5. Fringing (as worn by Belarus)
6. Something Ming from Flash Gordon would have worn (as worn by Romania)
And if the Eurovision 2013 choreography was anything to go by, here's what we'll be doing:
1. Being carried around by giants (as per Ukraine)
2. Generally putting our hands up (as per most entrants this year, but particularly Slovenia)
3. Rocking so hard our guitars catch on fire (as per Albania)
4. Contorting our bodies in a glass box (as per Azerbaijan)
It seems behind the sequins and white suits, there's a lot more to Eurovision than meets the eye.
The Eurovision Song Contest was started in 1956 by the European Broadcasting Union as a way to unite war-torn Europe through light-hearted entertainment.
Proving the Soviet philosophy of "anything the West can do, we can do it better", it launched the Intervision Song Contest. Ok, so originality wasn't necessarily their thing.
Intervision was an evolution of the existing Sopot International Song Festival (held in Sopot, Poland) and, unlike Eurovision, it was held in Sopot regardless of which Soviet state won.
Intervision was staged between 1977 and 1980, but came to an abrupt end when rising unrest in Poland during 1981 made it politically dangerous to stage such a major broadcast.
Interestingly, while Eurovision was only open to Western European countries, in an attempt to make this the world's premier music event Intervision was open to everyone. This saw representatives from the Soviet states perform alongside those from countries like Cuba and Finland.
However, one of the most hilarious aspects of Intervision was that because most citizens behind the Iron Curtain did not have telephones, viewers voted by turning on their lights if they liked the song and turned them off if they didn't.
The fluctuating demand on the electricity network determined the number of points granted to each contestant.
This seems quite an ingenious way of voting in the days before phones, internet and SMS, but surely open to flaws; what if everyone decided to take a toilet break during the same song?
It also seems remarkable that in the Soviet Union, citizens were given a small taste of democracy (albeit in a basic and crude form) where the voice of the people actually mattered and determined the winner.
Surely the organisers of Intervision didn't realise they could be whetting the audience's appetite to have a say in other aspects of their lives.
More than three decades later, even after the fall of the Berlin Wall and disintegration of the USSR, it seems Intervision may rise again.
In 2009, Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin proposed to restart the competition, but this time between Russia, China and Central Asian countries.
In the meantime, I'll stick to next week's Eurovision... and I'll be watching with the lights on.
It's time for my annual Eurovision First Listen Party where I sit down and do an initial evaluation of this year's entries.
One invitee to the party and one attendee.
I listened to the songs in the random order on which they appeared on my iPod. This means that I only have the song and the singers' voices to judge. There's been no background research on the songs or singers either at this stage. It's like my own version of The Voice (sans swivel chair).
However, past experience has shown that costumes, choreography and staging can go a long way to elevating an average song on the night itself. Still, you have to start somewhere.
Apart from Bonnie Tyler's Believe in Me for the UK, this is the first time I've heard these songs.
General thoughts:
I used to think the UK entry was OK, but after listening to all the countries, I now re-grade the song as great.
On first listen, it seems there are some pretty average / dull / forgettable songs this year (Europe's economic woes weighing everyone down?), but who knows what the Eurovision stage performances will bring. That's the magic of Eurovision.
Key changes never die; there's plenty in this year's crop
There's a fair few boys with high voices (but nothing beats Romania in that regard though)
Electric guitars seem big this year giving an '80s flavour to some songs
There seems to be a few songs making social commentary about the planet, environment or society in general. Always dangerous territory as they can come off a bit "preachy".
My top picks:
1. Sweden (Robin Stjernberg's You)
2. Belarus (Alyona Lanskaya's Solayoh)
3. Finland (Krista Siegfrids' Marry Me)
4. Ireland (Ryan Dolan's Only Love Survives)
5. Germany (Cascada's Glorious)
6. UK (Bonnie Tyler's Believe in Me)
The "strong song, but may struggle at Eurovision" Award:
The Netherlands (Anouk's Birds)
The "Only at Eurovision" Award:
Romania (Cezar's It's My Life - more specifically about 40 seconds into the song)
My thoughts on all contenders as I was listening: Full song titles and singers found here.
Croatia
A pretty little tune. Not sure what they're singing about. Sounds like the kind of song usually played over the closing credits of a 1980s film. I'm sure there's a electric keyboard and electric guitar. I got visions of Top Gun when I listened to this. The chorus of voices could come across quite well on stage.
Serbia
After a slow start, the techno beat finally kicks in. Not a terribly catchy tune I'm afraid.
Armenia
A song with a conscience. Appealing for humanity's sake, but sadly not overly appealing. Nice message, not such a great song. Features another electric guitar solo. "Lonely planet, who has done it? Who can save you? Who can stop it?"
Cyprus
A simple, acoustic guitar-backed song. Sounds like a song of yearning, but a little bit forgettable I'm afraid.
Iceland
Often a wild card at Eurovision, it usually either goes for dance anthem or traditional. This year a simple piano-backed ballad. A pretty tune, but is that enough?
Estonia
A strong, attractive voice. Another pretty tune - will be interesting what a live performance does with this song.
Finland
Finland's answer to Katy Perry? A really catchy song called "Marry Me". This will be fun on stage I can tell. "Oh oh a ding dong". Do my ears deceive me or is she swearing? The line "I do it for you, for you, for you" sounds like "I do it for you, I fxck you, I fxck you". Well, whatever you need to do to get Eurovision votes I guess.
Greece
Another country which either goes traditional or dancy. This year they've got a bit of both. Starts like a song straight from your local Greek taverna, but then before you know it's changed into a fast-paced ditty.
Hungary
An unusual song and not bad, but as I was listening to it, it sort of lulled me into a trance a bit. Not sure that's the secret to success on the live Eurovision stage. It hums along, never demanding your attention.
Moldova
Surprised how strongly you can really hear her accent coming through in this song. Becomes quite dramatic and shows off her range quite well. A break-up song with some obscure lines: "the Mayans were not so wrong, it's the end of the road, it's done, cause you were gone".
Slovenia
A techno dance track with thumping synth undercurrent. Quite like this one. Some of the synthesiser "bells and whistles" makes it sound familiar, but also maybe a little dated, like something from the late 1990s.
Sweden
Could we back to Sweden next year? Quite possibly. I would have this song on my iPod even if it wasn't Eurovision. A really listenable and catchy contemporary song.
Bulgaria
Sounds like it is being sung by two elderly sisters. Has an almost Indian / Hindi quality to it. Don't thing it's going to fly. And there's quite a long instrumental bit in the middle with them wailing over it.
Malta
I could imagine Jason Mraz singing this. A pretty, light-hearted tune which tells a story of Jeremy "working in IT".
Switzerland
Almost heavy metal but lacking a catchy tune, just a heavy rift in the background. A departure from the norm for Switzerland. You'll probably either love or hate this one.
Albania
At the start, I kept thinking Bonny M's Rasputin. I was waiting for the guy to say "Ohhh those Russians". Otherwise a bit of a forgettable song.
Belgium
Takes a while to get going and in Eurovision that's not a good thing as you've only got three minutes to impress. Once it does get going it's not a bad tune. Don't think it's a winner though.
FYR Macedonia
Seems to change tempo a few times during the song. It starts simply but then quickens about a third of the way in before going back to a slower tempo. A lot of wailing going on though which may lose people.
Israel
A simple little song. Feels like I've heard this before from Israel. At the end of the day, forgettable.
Latvia
A funny song with the potential to be catchy. "Here we go!". A chorus which is sung with some Eastern European rap as verses. Never quite builds to the energy it's proclaiming.
Russia
Another song with a message, but less preachy and more musical than Armenia's. Possibly not catchy enough to have any great impact.
Ukraine
This one has the potential to grow on me. Sounds a little clunky at the start but the chorus is sufficient to put it above some of the others. Could come across well on stage.
Belarus
A welcome surprise! A really strong and melodic chorus (with some questionable rhyming) makes this song more memorable than many others. This will be a fun one a night. Can it turn the Eurovision final into "a hot night!".
Georgia
I think this is the first true duet I've come across this year. The lyrics are about the joy of love, but the music is a bit pained, dramatic and drawn out. We'll see what they do on stage. I can see lots of opportunities for the wind machine.
Romania
WOOOOAAHHH! What's going on here? Cezar starts off with quite a deep voice and escalates into some sort of operatic flaseto. I had to quickly Google whether Cezar was a boy or girl (a boy it turns out). Quite a catchy tune and the potential to be the song everyone talks about. But will the song just be second fiddle to some impressive vocal gymnastics?
Lithuania
An OK song. It sounds like others you've heard before. Though any song coming right after Romania will have tough job on their hands.
Montenegro
An unusual song - power vocals in the chorus, rap-style verse. I found the changing tempo and background noises a bit overpowering.
The Netherlands
A really strong song, but actually quite sad and depressing / moving with its lyrics and tune. Not sure that's going to help in Eurovision. Sounds like something Lana Del Rey would sing.
Spain
The violin start makes it sound like it could be the entry from Ireland. It then just plods along but is a little bit forgettable.
Austria
It's an OK song. But I don't think there's anything which really elevates this song.
Denmark
This song has potential thanks to a melodic chorus, though it makes me think of a sea shanty. Not sure why.
Germany
I had high hopes for this song as I've liked Cascada's other songs. And I wasn't disappointed. A really strong contender and one of the few songs this year you can imagine actually getting traction outside of Eurovision. It will just depend whether the song's club anthem feel can be conveyed on the stage.
Norway
It has a really harsh synth intro and continues to have this heavy and dramatic undercurrent. Don't think it's going to make waves at Eurovision though.
Azerbaijan
Quite a strong contender from Azerbaijan. They've got quite a track record now of having strong entries (which resulted in them hosting the event last year!). This won't see Eurovision go back to Baku, but a good effort.
France
The great thing about France is you never know what they're going to put up. Will it be crazy? Club? Artistic? Soulful? This seems like a good, playing-it-straight entry. Don't think it will set the world on fire though.
Ireland
I liked this one from the moment it started. It's got a good pace, he's got a nice voice and let's face it, it's not Jedward!
Italy
One of those songs which plods along. It feels like someone is just talking to me as the melody isn't anything special.
San Marino
I have to admit I'm a bit biased on this on. The woman who sings this sang the dreadful Social Network Song at last year's Eurovision. But here she is back again. The song is fairly vanilla, but does show she does have a strong voice. Perhaps she's trying to redeem herself? I'm guessing she won't be wandering around the stage with a laptop this year?
Uniting Kingdom
This song has really grown on me. To be fair, I've heard this on the radio a lot more times than the other songs. Depending on how Bonnie delivers this in Sweden, it could be a real contender.
So bring on the Eurovision semi-finals and final in May!
Beneath the white suits, glittery skirts and porcelain-white smiles there's a war waging.
It's that time of year when Europe (plus Israel) battle it out for the prestigious title of Eurovision winner.
But in many ways, this year's fight began a few months ago when competing countries started selecting the performers and songs to represent them. The next phase of battle will occur at the semi-finals and final being staged in Malmo, Sweden, in May.
Like all good battles, a range of strategies (or gimmicks) have been deployed by all competing nations in their quest for Eurovision glory.
Sometimes these strategies work. Other times they fail spectacularly.
Here are 15 Common Eurovision Battle Tactics:
1. Resurrect Past Winners Ignoring the old adage that lightening doesn't strike twice and deploying a previous Eurovision winner in the hope of history repeating itself. (Note: it rarely works)
This approach was most recently adopted by Germany, which chose 2010 Eurovision winner Lena (song "Satellite") to represent it again in 2011. And you don't necessarily need to have won to get the call-up again. Ireland used X Factor-rejects Jedward in 2011 and 2012, but failed to land the top prize on both occasions.
Germany's Lena in 2010 with the winning song "Satellite"
And Lena again in 2011 with "Taken By A Stranger"
2. Dare To Be Different Bucking the trend by performing something different, quirky or unusual. (Note: High chance of failure)
The Eurovision battlefield is littered with the glittery remains of those who dared to be different. Over the years there have been puppets, transexuals, midgets, angle grinders, country 'n' western, and everything else you can cram onto a stage in three minutes. But every now and then a unique act captures Europe's imagination, making the win even sweeter.
Finland's Lordi performed "Hard Rock Hallelujah" to take the 2006 Eurovision title
Everything old is new again: popular 2012 Russian entry Buranovskiye Babushki with "Party for Everybody"
3. Shock and Awe Injecting an element of surprise into your performance to keep the audience on their toes
Lithuania's 2012 entry Donny Montell managed to squeeze in two surprises during his performance of "Love Is Blind"; he started the song blindfolded and then ripped it off to do a one-handed cartwheel on stage. Maybe he should have gone for the trifecta as he walked away empty handed.
Oh I get it... love is blind
A one-hand cartwheel into the audience's hearts
4. Flashy Threads Understanding that flashing your best assets on stage may not necessarily have anything to do with your vocal chords
From traditional folk dress through to dramatic costume reveals and on-stage costume changes, what you are wearing can play a big role on the night. Ensuring your costume shows off your lovely set of pins, hefty cleavage or impressive pecs is all part of selling your Eurovision song.
Moldova's 2009 entry "Hora Din Moldova" by Nelly Ciobanu
Ireland's Jedward with their 2012 "Waterline"
5. Keepin' It Real Ditching classic Eurovision conventions, rules and trends, and charging on regardless (Note: probably only your own country will appreciate this... and they can't vote for you)
This is a firm favourite of non-English speaking countries who, every now and then, say "stuff it, we're going to perform in our own language even if no one has a clue what we're saying". The integrity is admirable, but rarely results in the top prize.
Translation dictionaries at the ready: Finland's 2010 entry "Kuunkuikaajat" with Tyolki Elaa
6. Arty Farty Trying to inject a touch of class to the event by displaying actual talent. (Note: Europe's not interested)
France is often guilty of this, which could be why it hasn't won in a while. In 2009, it offered the chanson "S'il Fallait Le Faire" by Patricia Kaas, while in 2010 tenor Amaury Vassili stirred with "Sognu".
France's 2011 entry Amaury Vassili flashes his vocal chords
7. Club Anthems Enlisting strong beats, electric sounds and catchy choruses to move the audience
A strategy which is increasingly rolled out at Eurovision, these countries are hoping their thumping track will be what clubbers will be moving to this summer. But a word of warning, if there is an abundance of "anthems" in a given year they tend to blend into one another.
Sweden's Loreen powered to victory with her anthematic "Euphoria" in 2012
8. Call In The Big Guns Enlisting the help of famous entertainers from outside the Eurovision world hoping their reputation and fan base will bolster the entry's appeal. (Note: Looks desperate)
Despite using this strategy a number of times in recent years, from Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber in 2009, reformed Blue in 2011, Englebert Humperdinck in 2012 and Bonnie Tyler this year, the United Kingdom has yet to find it successful.
Andrew Lloyd Webber co-wrote and co-performed the UK's 2009 entry "My Time"
9. Mega Props Filling up the stage with big, moving props giving the performers lots to do while singing. Particularly useful in distracting an audience from noticing it's actually a pretty average song.
This is deployed by all countries from time to time when budgets are willing. Memorably used by Greece in 2009 by Sakis Rouvas during the song "This Is Our Night" when he straddled something that resembled a giant stapler. Investing in the prop probably did little to ease the country's debt issues.
Greece's "giant stapler" prop of 2009
10. Topical Forcing relevancy by making your entry so "now" it hurts. (Note: you're history)
San Marino's 2012 entry Valentina Monetta went with "The Social Network Song", while Ukranian Svetlana Loboda sang "Be My Valentine (Anti-Crisis Girl)" in 2009, just months after the GFC began. Sadly, songs about topical events are usually relegated to the history books.
Valentina Monetta's "The Social Network Song"
11. Popera Power Combining the power vocals of an opera singer with a killer dance beat
A range of classically-trained performers have trodden across the Eurovision stage accompanied by a thumping beat and light show. Often used in conjunction with Strategy Seven: Club Anthems. They can either be uplifting or just plain loud.
The vocal acrobatics of Malena Ernman with "La Voix" represented Sweden in 2009
12. Burn Baby Burn Harnessing the fascination we have had with fire since we lived in caves. (Note: you could get burnt)
Eurovision's health and safety officers are kept busy on the night as acts frequently deploy fire, fireworks and sparks to illuminate their act. Finding a novel way to incorporate all things fire into the act now remains the key. In 2010, Turkey had a lady dressed in a metal suit bounce an angle grinder off her arm creating impressive sparks.
Bright spark during maNga's "We Could Be The Same" performance in 2010
13. Daze and Confuse Leaving audiences wondering "WTF?"
Rarely a winning strategy, sometimes it seems this approach is embraced by countries that really don't want to host next year's Eurovision, but still want to turn up this year.
Albania's Kejsi Tola in 2009 with "Carry Me In Your Dreams": A blue man and two breakdancing midgets. Make sense?
14. Crank Up The Wind Machine to 11 Turning up the wind machine to literally blow the audience away. (Note: apply extra hair spray)
All countries are guilty of using this one at some point, particularly during the inevitable dramatic key changes during a song. It can help add energy and excitement to a song and/or create some wardrobe and hair malfunctions.
Norway's 2010 entry by Chanee and N'evergreen' called "In A Moment Like This"
15. Keep it Pretty Distracting the audience with good looks
Eurovision doesn't just attract musicians, but also a fair share of actresses, models and others all vying for European attention. However sometimes they aren't as easy on the ears as they are on the eye.
