1. You keep yelling out "heads" every time you sit down and reach for the non-existent ski lift bar
2. You wonder why you can still feel your toes and fingers at the end of the day
3. You feel nude going out in less than five layers of clothing
4. Walking and running seem incredibly slow and boring
5. Everything seems way too flat - where are the mountains?
6. You miss your nose constantly running
7. You hate the fact that you now get change when you buy a can of coke with a $5 note
8. Days seem way too long now the sun gets up before 7.30am and sunset is after 5pm
9. You wonder if your street would be classed a beginner, intermediate or difficult piste
10. When someone cuts you off in traffic you instinctively mutter: "bloody snowboarders!"
11. Towards the end of the day you ask passers-by: "when do the lifts close around here?"
12. You try to swipe you ski lift pass every time you go through a door or gate
13. There's no après ski vibe on the train home
14. The first thing you do in the morning is pull back the curtains and wonder if there was any snow overnight
15. You constantly feel as though you've forgotten something when you leave the house. Where's my helmet, goggles, gloves, glove liners, hand warmers, neck warmers and piste map?